HENRY IV, PART I

A monologue from Act I, Scene iii

by: William Shakespeare

HOTSPUR: My liege, I did deny no prisoners.

But I remember, when the fight was done,

When I was dry with rage and extreme toil,

Breathless and faint, leaning upon my sword,

Came there a certain lord, neat and trimly dressed,

Fresh as a bridegroom, and his chin new reaped

Showed like a stubble land at harvest time.

He was perfumèd like a milliner,

And twixt his finger and his thumb he held

A pouncet box [1], which ever and anon

He gave his nose, and took't away again;

Who therewith angry, when it next came there,

Took it in snuff; and still he smiled and talked;

And as the soldiers bore dead bodies by,

He called them untaught knaves, unmannerly,

To bring a slovenly unhandsome corse

Betwixt the wind and his nobility.

With many holiday and lady [2] terms

He questioned me, amongst the rest demanded

My prisoners in your majesty's behalf.

I then, all smarting with my wounds being cold,

To be so pestered with a popingay,

Out of my grief and impatience

Answered neglectingly, I know not what--

He should, or he should not; for he made me mad

To see him shine so brisk, and smell so sweet,

And talk so like a waiting gentlewoman

Of guns and drums and wounds -- God save the mark! [3] --

And telling me the sovereignest thing on earth

Was parmacity [4] for an inward bruise,

And that it was great pity, so it was,

This villainous saltpetre should be digged

Out of the bowels of the harmless earth,

Which many a good tall fellow had destroyed

So cowardly, and but for these vile guns,

He would himself have been a soldier.

This bald [5] unjointed chat of his, my lord,

I answered indirectly, as I said,

And I beseech you, let not his report

Come current [6] for an accusation

Betwixt my love and your high majesty.

Purchase this play!

1 perfume box

2 affected and effeminate

3 avert anything so ridiculous

4 spermaceti ointment

5 trivial

6 be accepted